Treat Your Children As You Would Like To Be Treated And You Can’t Go Wrong

Treat your children as you would like to be treated. Erase their fears, name those emotions they don’t know how to express, give them their present time, fulfill their dreams and make them feel like they are the most valuable people in the world.

It is curious how many mothers and fathers nowadays see the child with a little fear. They read education manuals, try to be instructed in the latest theories and seek answers to every problem on the internet or with friends (who are also parents or not),  known as true gurus in parenting issues. These parents forget to listen to something far more valuable than all that: their natural instincts.

A mother’s instinct or a father’s natural ability to intuit the needs of their own children is, without a doubt, the best strategy for educating them. Children come into the world with an innate goodness, which is why they deserve to be treated with respect  to safeguard this nobility of heart, taking care of every event that daily life brings us naturally and without fear.

Children must be treated with affection and without fear.

There are mothers and fathers who are afraid of failing in their roles as parents. They think it can be a tragedy not to be able to throw them the best birthday party, not find places for them at the best school in town, or not be able to buy them the same designer clothes their little friends wear in high school. They aspire, somehow, to offer their children what they themselves did not have.

Of course, everyone is free to choose how to raise a child, but we often forget what children are like and everything that goes on inside them. We insist on thinking about everything we should offer them without first finding out what they really need: ourselves.

• A child is not a miniature adult, he is a person who needs to understand the world through you and with your help.

• A child always acts out of necessity and not out of manipulation or malice like adults. We have to be intuitive about these demands.

• A child must, above all, be treated with affection. Our kids don’t need designer clothes or electronic games to play alone. They need your time, your example, your goodnight hugs  and your hand to hold as you cross the street.

Self-regulated creation: understanding and monitoring

Self-regulated parenting is directly nurtured by attachment theories  formulated by psychiatrist Wilhelm Reich. They are currently being discussed again because they extol a series of key concepts through which it is possible to connect much better with childhood, with its times, with its needs.

The interesting thing about this approach is that self-regulation is understood as synonymous with life, the need to make contact for the first time with our own personal complexity to understand that the child also has its own needs, its own conflicts, sometimes generated by a society that does not understand childhood or child.

Keys to Self-Regulated Creation

Self-regulated parenting tells us that a child who was treated with respect in their childhood and who also saw how their parents respected all those around them will be a respectful adult.

But how can we achieve this achievement? How does self-regulated parenting teach us to create happy adults for the world?

• A child must feel understood and accompanied at all times. If frustration appears, it ceases to feel adapted, integrated.

• It is necessary to educate with a healthy attachment based on love and closeness. In this way, little by little, this child will feel safe to take his own steps to achieve independence.

• A child’s voice must be listened to at all times, because they must also be taken into account when they laugh and cry, when they demand or when they suggest.

• Self-regulated upbringing also tells us about time, of not starting intellectual learning until the child turns 7 years old, to provide a childhood of discoveries through play.

The interaction with the environments in which the child is inserted through the five senses and the relationships with their peers through joy also offers us an interesting way to favor their psychosocial development. However, and whatever approach we choose to raising our children, we shouldn’t forget something as simple as treating them with this sure-fire and foolproof magic formula: love.