There Are People I Miss, But I Don’t Want Them Back
Maybe you miss and remember some people but don’t want them back in your life. This feeling is usually shared among people who have been part of our lives but with whom we end up creating dysfunctional relationships.
The value of the reminders and warnings they give us
Every now and then we need to alleviate the heartache that the absence of someone we once wanted so well produces, but who has left our lives either because we decided to prioritize our well-being, or because the situation got to the point where it exploded, or simply by separate paths guided by the passing of life.
In other words, yes, feeling homesick but not wanting something or someone to be present in our daily lives is as normal as it is healthy. Why? Among many reasons why it helps us determine and make us aware of what is really good for us.
We may remember an old love, an old friendship, or someone with whom we had a relationship that could have been but wasn’t. Why invalidate our feelings and our nostalgia? Not doing this is the first step: remembering and missing it is perfectly understandable.
Sensations and emotions, a healthy containment wall
Maybe this relationship brought us something that was gratifying for us, material or not, and so it’s normal that it stays in our memory and that we miss everything that was good. However, if we balance the positive and the negative, sometimes the balance is tipped to the second side, which also deserves our recognition.
Toxic relationships that actually aren’t
We are used to giving the qualification of “toxic person” to all the people who caused us to suffer in some way. When these people appear in our memories, they torment and surprise us by showing us that we lack something negative, toxic or poisonous to ourselves. However, as we’ve said so far, there are many shades of color in relationships besides black and white.
Each person and each relationship brings us something, even if it’s something we end up seeing as a bad thing. In this regard, we must understand that all learning is valid and adds something to us, even if the relationship has created some vacuum at some point in our lives.
Let’s not forget that the people who nurture our souls are not just those we stay with forever, because everything has its time and place to happen, even if in the end it’s only in our memories and memories.