The Somatization Of Emotions In Dependent People
If you’ve ever suffered from anxiety, you probably know what the concept of somatization of emotions refers to. Our bodies begin to manifest a series of symptoms that seem to have no apparent cause. Some examples are noticing that something is obstructing your throat, noticing the appearance of a rash on your skin, or noticing digestive problems.
Today we are going to discover that the somatization of emotions in dependent people, in addition to being very common, is greater than normal.
The big problem that arises when we somatize emotions is the inability to relate what we are feeling with what is manifesting in our body. We tend to justify the stomachache we get from something we eat that maybe wasn’t right.
We even think that the skin problems we have are the result of an allergic reaction. Sometimes that may be true, but if we suffer from anxiety and find ourselves in an addictive relationship, chances are our symptoms mean something else.
To better understand how the somatization of emotions acts on dependent people, let’s tell the story of Rebeca (fictitious name). With this character, let’s get into an insane attachment relationship. In it, we can see how the symptomatology is warning her to get out of this relationship.
The somatization of Rebeca’s emotions
Rebeca was in a relationship for 3 years, although it didn’t go well. His partner was always playing video games and wanted to be at home all the time. She, in turn, wanted to go out more and do other types of activities. However, there were many other aspects that indicated that they didn’t quite fit; but Rebeca had entered this relationship for fear of being alone and would not let go so easily.
In addition, Rebeca had many disagreements with her boyfriend’s mother. The woman had been a single mother and was very attached to her child. The constant calls and even pretense saying not feeling well to keep your child’s attention were something very common and generated arguments. Rebeca complained, she was upset, but in the end she was back as she always was.
During the third year of dating, something strange began to happen to Rebeca. Sometimes, in the most unexpected situations, she had an allergic reaction on her face. Sometimes, rashes appeared when having intimate relationships with your partner. She didn’t make a big deal out of it at first. She took some medicine and got on with her life.
This is a clear example of emotions that manifest in the body. In fact, as we said at the beginning of the article, the somatization of emotions in dependent people is a clear indication that something is not right.
In addition, the body, as symptoms are ignored, acts with other types of problems (digestive, pain, dermatitis, etc.) until the person realizes what is happening and takes some action to change the situation.
The moment when everything got worse
One day, at a dinner with friends of her partner’s mother, Rebeca began to have difficulty speaking. It felt like her throat was closing up. Rebeca controlled herself, but from that day on, it happened again in other situations. When he went to the doctor, he was told he had a “hysterical cake”.
Rebekah, as in the case of the rashes, didn’t pay much attention to this. He ignored the fact that he began to suffer from sleep paralysis, severe headaches, and nausea. In addition to severe stomach pains before meeting your partner.
One day, when she fought with her partner over something related to her mother, she spent a whole day not knowing anything about him. In fact, when Rebeca called him and he didn’t answer, she didn’t look well.
She had her worst state, was thinking her partner wanted to dump her. Suddenly, he started to feel an unbearable headache, he lost the desire to eat and his blood pressure dropped. She couldn’t get up from the couch as she felt dizzy. When her partner called her, all this symptomatology reduced to the point of forgetting what had happened.
the dependency relationship
Rebeca did not realize that she no longer wanted to be with her partner. She always reproached herself when she had to spend a certain amount of time at home so that her boyfriend could play video games or that he didn’t put limits on his mother. She was fed up with putting up with the same situation. What’s more, she was upset with herself because at first she didn’t say anything, she was blind, and now everything bothered her.
Deep inside, she wanted to end the relationship because it was wearing her out. But I wasn’t capable, I was too afraid to be alone. His inability to make a coherent decision manifested itself in his body. He wasn’t in a relationship he felt good about.
In the end, Rebeca ended the relationship, but she already had someone else in mind to avoid being alone. After a certain time, the same symptoms returned, but this time multiplied by 100. The cycle was repeating itself once more and the symptoms were getting worse.
As we have seen, if the problem that led to somatization is not resolved, it will reappear in other circumstances and with other people. The somatization of emotions in addicted people is a warning that they must delve into what they have been feeling and ignoring for so long.
The somatization of emotions in dependent people can be very serious and cause panic attacks, very serious physical discomfort and great unhappiness. Those who suffer from addiction do not realize this is happening to them. However, if they stopped to listen to their own body, they would know that they want to get out of the situation in which they find themselves.
What we want with this story is not only to learn to identify what our body’s signals mean, but also to recognize them in ourselves so we can act. If you think your body is sending a message, listen to it. Overall, you’ll end up discovering something really valuable.
