Love And Responsibility: The Importance Of Caring For What You Love
Love and responsibility are two sides of the same coin. Partner, children, family, friends and even yourself. Caring for those who are part of our life and also for ourselves means acting responsibly, paying attention to our actions and taking care of the well-being of those we love. Something so basic is, however, a detail that we often overlook.
We do this, for example, when we blame the other for certain problems or situations. We often place all circumstances on the shoulders of others, without being able to see that we are sometimes also participants in many dynamics. A relationship, whatever the bond (such as love, friendship, etc.), is an interaction between two people who feed back.
On this small planet, everything counts: words, actions, what is said and also what is not said. For this precious world to keep turning with the same brightness, we must learn to be responsible. We are able to exercise this psychological muscle with intelligence and sensitivity.
Love and responsibility: pillars that support this relationship
One thing psychotherapist Albert Ellis used to point out is that many people prefer to shirk their responsibilities. It’s always easier to escape or let others take over each circumstance in their own skin. So if we really want to play an active role in the theater of life, love and happiness, it is up to us to be responsible.
In recent years, this has been a new area of study that brings together more and more research papers. Works like the one carried out by the University of Missouri remind us that, being free to make our own decisions, to be autonomous, to create friendships, couples or families, we are obliged to develop this competence. Furthermore, responsibility and happiness are two dimensions that always go together.
Now let’s see which pillars support this relationship.
What you say and do is important to each other: be responsible for your actions
Nothing we do (or fail to do) goes unnoticed by those who love us. And sometimes we ignore it. We neglect the other’s perspective by focusing exclusively on ourselves. We don’t measure the effect of our behaviors or words thinking that those who love us won’t take this or that into account. However, everything is processed and filtered at the level of emotions.
The responsibility to assume one’s mistakes
A person who is mature and has adequate emotional competence is the one who is capable of taking on his own mistakes and correcting them. The idea of holding the other person responsible for what happened will rarely cross her mind. At no time will she try to project feelings of guilt onto others.
If something has happened and you are directly or indirectly responsible for this suffering, you should step forward and find a way to deal with it.
Be aware, know what’s right and what’s wrong
Responsibility and awareness are two basic cogs in happy relationships. This ability to glimpse the reality of each situation, recognize what is happening, know what is right, what is wrong and act accordingly is an act of affective health.
We often complain about those people who “are not aware of certain things”, who act without thinking about the consequences and oppress us with their selfishness and childish behavior. Few things are more necessary than developing a good awareness of how to act in every situation.
You are my responsibility (and I am yours)
Love and responsibility are a thread that is intertwined with daily complicity, with the authentic desire to care for and protect those you love. Understanding that the other is our responsibility (and vice versa) means, above all, that each one must strive to promote the well-being of others, to be a help and not an obstacle, to be that impulse that gives wings and not the one who imposes resistance or binds chains.
Know what you need, tell you what I need
Another principle of responsibility in affective bonds is to offer the other what he needs. Most of the time, we know how this dimension is articulated: we all need to feel loved, respected, valued and supported in every circumstance.
Likewise, it is also important to know how to express to the other what we want, what we don’t want and what we lack. We have a responsibility to know how to express and claim without waiting for others to guess what is happening to us.
love and responsibility
A relationship, be it friendship, couple or the bond we establish with a brother, a mother or a child, gives us meaning and also purpose. This is something we must consider and keep in mind at all times. Such a thing forces us to take responsibility for many aspects, not just those that focus exclusively on the other.
Being responsible also means investing in love, because nothing is more enriching than that. In doing so, something always comes back to us, always nourishes us, gives us vital meaning and transcendence. Taking care of what you love is taking care of what gives us meaning and happiness.
