How To Identify A Person With Emotional Intelligence?

It is often said that 7 minutes is enough to realize if we are dealing with someone very smart. Now, in addition to the cognitive aspect or stored knowledge, there is another aspect of value in making this judgment. How to identify a person with emotional intelligence? How do we know if we are facing a capable and efficient mind when it comes to dealing with this psychological universe so relevant?

Salovey and Mayer (1990) already said in their time that this competence defines who has the ability to adequately express emotions. It also involves those who adapt their thoughts and behaviors effectively, first regulating their psychophysical universes.

Daniel Goleman indicates that it is easier to identify a person with low emotional intelligence than the other way around. They make more noise. They are men and women with the behavior of a 3-year-old child. Personalities who get frustrated quickly, who get carried away by impulses and who have serious problems establishing quality social relationships.

Somehow, in our daily lives we will find figures with better or worse abilities. So let’s look at what factors to look out for.

Important aspects to identify a person with emotional intelligence

We currently have several psychometric tools for assessing emotional intelligence. Research papers, such as those carried out at the University of Queensland, highlight that between the late 1990s and 2000s this type of evidence began to proliferate. Everyone wants to assess this set of characteristics, both academically and at work.

Now, in addition to these assessment tools, we have our real needs. Many of us would like to have people in our midst who are skilled in this emotional competence. It would be great to quickly see if the person we’re attracted to is competent at managing emotions and social skills. We would love our boss to be a great leader on this issue, for example.

Let’s see which dimensions are important.

Efficient communication: listening, empathizing, understanding and responding

There are great communicators with terrible emotional intelligence. We refer to those who are addicted to talking about themselves, to presenting their arguments without leaving room for comments and other opinions. They can usually dazzle us at first with their expertise, but be careful. A high IQ won’t matter if you don’t have good emotional control.

Therefore, to identify a person with emotional intelligence, the following dimensions must be addressed:

• This is someone who practices active listening.
• You argue your ideas confidently and assertively, yet respectfully.
• It takes our reactions into account and never loses eye contact.
• He is an empathetic person.
• It understands what we are saying and offers positive and enriching feedback.

They experience anger, sadness, disappointment, etc., but they know how to regulate their emotions without infecting us

It is easier to identify a person with emotional intelligence if we witness how they handle a complicated situation. A problem at work, a specific disagreement, a disappointment, a mistake made… Something that is wrongly assumed is that people with this ability are like “buddhas” of balance. This is not true.

The person skilled in this capacity experiences and is impacted by negative valence emotions. But there’s something we’ll also discover: they don’t get carried away by what they feel. They reason, they work and, above all, they will never burden others with these more complicated states.

How to Identify a Person with Emotional Intelligence: Their Good Social Skills

Good social skills go beyond excellent communication skills. So, to identify a person with emotional intelligence, it pays to pay attention to these crucial details:

• They know how to take criticism and express it without hurting anyone.
• They handle hostility effectively.
• They are good at problem solving.
• They handle the negativity of the environment well.
• They convey good doses of positivity to others, no matter how they feel.

• They are good negotiators.
• They know how to apologize and make mistakes.
• They are very skillful and assertive in defending their own rights and the rights of others.

They make you feel comfortable at all times

There is a simple key to identifying a person with emotional intelligence: ask yourself how they make you feel. If you feel that you are yourself all the time, that you are comfortable and that you are free to express yourself without fear of being judged, you are with someone special.

Emotional intelligence has the subtle charm of creating highly nutritious environments in which we all grow up. We grew in self-esteem, social connectivity, respect, security. Nothing is as important to a human being as finding someone to trust.

This not only allows you to regulate your own emotions to think and act better, but, above all, it helps to harmonize social relationships. It provides that exceptional material that is confidence, knowing how to always be in tune with what others feel.