How Are People With Depression Perceived?
We all fought countless battles. Work, family, relationships… Every day is a new challenge in many ways. However, it is the battle we wage against ourselves that can generate depressive states that paralyze us. We now know that people with depression often magnify the resonance of symptoms.
A report published by Dr. Kopala-Sibley suggests that, in depressive states, it is useful to focus less on symptomatology and pay more attention to how a person feels about themselves. This could be one of the keys to the origin of depression. And it’s better to treat the source than the symptoms.
The report’s findings reinforce Higgins’ self-discrepancy theory. According to this theory, our “I” has three different aspects: the real self, the ideal self, and the responsible self.
This research by Kopala-Sibley indicates that when there is a discrepancy between the ideal self and the real self, we are very likely to find people with depression.
How does self-discrepancy occur in people with depression?
We build our self-concept based on several variables. We believe that our “I” is a unique entity, when it isn’t. We have a self that defines us, as we are in reality and in the present moment, the real self.
But there are other parallel “I”s, like the “I” we can become ; within that field of possibilities, there would be the ideal self. The responsible self is also part of the group, which indicates how we should be based on the customs and social roles we adopt.
You can be sure of being a competent, intelligent and hard-working person, but if in real life these characteristics do not bear fruit because your work situation limits you, conflict appears. In this case, it is the mismatch between the ideal self and the real self that would pave the way for depression.
In turn, self-esteem also depends on the perceived distance between our real self and our ideal self. Self-esteem is closely linked to our psychological well-being and its deterioration makes us more vulnerable to depression.
Gray matter levels in people with low self-esteem are lower in brain regions that facilitate the task of intuiting what others think of us.
The internal narrative
Our real self and our ideal self relate to each other based on the story we build about ourselves and how we believe others perceive us. Self-esteem benefits from this minimum distance .
So it is likely that if signs of depression appear, we are facing a significant discrepancy between the real self and the ideal self.
The internal patterns we maintain during depressive periods lead us to believe that our ideal self is far removed from our real self. To bring these two realities closer together, we can change our internal patterns and dialogues.
Focusing on what we could change to get closer to our ideal self is a good start.
mindfulness
If after making a shift in the internal narrative we still feel that there aren’t many things that can be done to get closer to our ideal self, we can focus on mindfulness practice. This kind of practice reduces the gaps between the real self and the ideal self.
The immediate benefit of this type of meditation is that it allows one to learn to observe one’s thoughts without judging them. Resigning the position of judge considerably improves the depressive state.
Gradual self-acceptance in people with depression is another way to bring these two realities together.
Aligning real beings with ideals
Perhaps it is not about reaching perfection, but about recognizing this room for improvement as a terrain to be overcome. Treating ourselves with love gives us a more relaxed emotional environment to set some goals while we discard others.
The practice of these strategies can help a lot to control our expectations and, therefore, the frustration that can result from them. In this sense, depression is likely a wake-up call for us to pay attention to our internal discrepancies and work on them.
