Pursuing Those Who Harm Us Is A Cause Of Discomfort
When we leave our self-esteem abandoned in the hands of other people, or those who like to control us and exert power over us, we tend to plunge into an endless pursuit to believe we’ve got it back. However, chasing down those who harm us is one of the many ways that we don’t like ourselves.
True love, both for others and for ourselves, is nothing but the inevitable desire to help and help us to show our authenticity. Pursuing those who harm us is a way of not finding ourselves, but rather of finding the other at any cost, forgetting, in a way, about ourselves.
When we are in a relationship and we realize that, being able to avoid some suffering, the other person doesn’t do it, this is a clear indicator that he doesn’t care for us as he should… What happens is that sometimes we are so blind that we don’t we see how the rest of people can manipulate us and take advantage of us for their own benefit.
You are the only person who can stop this
When there really is love, taking care of our partner is an intrinsic contract of the heart. So, if we notice that our partner hurts us as a way to maintain the relationship, this is a good time to stop him, as only we can do that.
When the person we share life with makes us feel bad more often than it makes us feel good, we should ask ourselves if that person adds or subtracts us. With that answer, we’ll know if we want to share the rest of our lives that way.
Closing a stage in life, saying goodbye to those we love, despite hurting, is one of the most cyclical experiences that can happen in the world of emotions. We already know that the hardest part is not the first kiss, but the last one. However, at times this last kiss can be saving us from many more bitter ones.
When our partner hurts us constantly, it may be that the lack of self-esteem ends up taking us to the bottom of the pit, so that we will no longer know how to differentiate what we are from the harm done to us. Only the victim can stop this emotional pain because when they start to hurt us, there is no other way than self-love.
Obsession, fear of being alone, hope or devotion?
Every relationship can end badly; we must be aware of this. The only way to get over the end is to accept it. Otherwise, it will be much more difficult to control the situation and the damage will end up turning into obsession, fear, hope and even devotion.
Some psychologists say that a breakup can be more painful than someone’s death. According to this theory, death has a pain process that ends with acceptance. On the other hand, when the couple ends and there is no such acceptance, the suffering can extend for a long period of time and even never heal.
Obsessions, the inordinate fear of being alone and devotion are definitely feelings that contain a little contempt for one’s own person and the exaltation of the loved one. As an example, we leave here this poem by Hamlet Lima Quintana to reflect:
